OK, I shamefully admit that I watch ABC’s, “The Bachelor.” If you don’t watch it, chances are you have heard of it. It’s that guilty pleasure in which one man courts 25 women to find true love. The 25 women live in one house as they vie for the attention and affection of one man . . . similar to an ancient king and his harem.

The bachelors and bachelorettes are different each season, but the story and the drama are the same. Boy meets girls. Boy dates girls. Boy finds a “connection” with one girl through process of elimination. Boy proposes to girl. Boy (or girl) breaks off engagement. New season begins and our hopes that two people will find true, everlasting love are restored. Thank you ABC!

This season we all watched bachelor, and single father, Jason choose between two women: Melissa and Molly. In the end he chose and proposed to Melissa only to break off the engagement and pursue Molly six weeks later.

Why the broken engagement? According to Jason, “after the show the chemistry changed.” I watched this painfully awkward breakup on national television feeling as if I was invasively watching a counseling session. I shouted at the TV, “Of course the chemistry changed! It’s called REAL LIFE! In the real world we don’t have the ABC intern delivering champagne and strawberries, arranging fantasy dates of bungee jumping (although that would not be my idea of a fantasy date), and whisking us off to New Zealand!”

In the real world relationships are defined by the mundane. Once the fireworks stop, once the magic ends, once the endorphins of the dating phase fade we’re forced to decide if this is the person with whom we can endure a lifetime of careers, cooking, laundry and later on diapers, little league, and homework. Can we survive the daily grind and still love each other at the end of the day?

Sometimes married life and parenthood can seem like Groundhog Day. But if we can find joy with our spouse in the monotony of it all, then we have found true love. If you are dating or engaged, I encourage you to ask yourself if you can survive and thrive in the tedious task of daily life with this person. If you are already married, I encourage you to find joy and contentment in the routine. Then those fantasy dates will not be expected, rather they will be icing on the cake!